Some days I sit here and start writing, and then decide not to publish anything. I'm still very depressed, but not as much as when I wrote my last post. I was so depressed I did not even call my doctor until much later. Now it's too late and I might have wasted not one cycle, but two.
You really need to be in the right frame of mind when you are incurring in self-harm through daily injections, plus allowing access to your vagina to a stranger on a regular basis. I was not in the right frame of mind, and in fact I am not sure I'm there yet. I have another appointment next Wednesday.
I have not missed a single day of work. I have often cried at work but have managed to pretend I have a cold or something. The fact that it is always very cold in my lab helps.
I stopped going to zumba. That was bad. I started again this week and felt quite good about it. I also started yoga. The first thing out of the teacher's mouth was that we should not simply take Prozac or other pills for stress and depression, that we should instead seek to heal ourselves, which of course takes time and effort.