Doggy pictures!

Of course we made more pictures but  the spouse has yet to email them to me. So I copied the pictures from the rescue webpages. After all , these are the pictures I saw when I decided I wanted her.

I like that she's small, cute and curly like my old dog, but she's different enough that she does not remind me of him. For starters, she's YELLOW.  She has brown nose, eyes and ears. The defunct pooch was all white with black eyes and nose. He was taller, but she has a longer body. He had a very thin coat,while hers is thick, a little less curly and has guard hairs. Her face is completely different.
And the energy! I had forgotten what it was like to have a young dog. She's about two years old, so she is no puppy. But compared to my senile pooch she is amazingly playful. I was told she was a picky eater,  but she gobbled everything up, in contrast to my anorexic dog who needed a lot of coaxing.

She has had two accidents, and she took them well. I thought maybe she'd resent me after scolding her but a minute later she was again following me around. We'll see what happens today, when she will be home alone while we are at work.

I believe she's a keeper!

Sorrow

T's IVF failed. She's heartbroken and so are all of us, her friends from afar. I cannot imagine a better set of parents, and yet it is just not happening for them, in spite of all the money, effort, tears and indignities that the procedure entails. Some of you know more about it than I do.

I already sent her an email, but I feel I should call her tonight. What can I possibly tell her? I know nothing I say will cheer her up. The best I can hope for is not say anything stupid that will upset her.

The yellow dog

I've wanted another dog for a while now. The new job and the kidney adventure got in the way, but I've known for months who I am getting my dog from. There's this charity that rescues dogs from kill shelters in LA and brings them to the Bay Area. I've been browsing their pages since December looking for a mutt.

Last week I dreamed we finally had our dog, a female poodle. She was not white, she was yellow. Only when I woke up I wondered what was with that, given that all the time I have pictured our future dog as a white poodle or poodle mix. I usually ignore my dreams, but I shared this one with the spouse, and with Dr. Funny. The only thing Dr. Funny had to say was that I should speed up the process of getting a dog, since I obviously yearn for one.

Last time I checked the website I found a pretty butterscotch lady that happens to be a Dachshund and Poodle mix. She reminded me of my dream, and I forwarded the info to the spouse in an email that said: "I told you she was yellow". He liked her too and gave me the go ahead.

Today we get to meet her, and hopefully bring her home.

I called Dr. Mediocre and he told me to start the birth control pills this Sunday, even if I never got my period. He did recommend that I perform another pregnancy test because, you know, pregnancy is still the main cause for missed periods. I told him of the three negative results, one of them in the ER, and he said that I could skip the test.

Of course, he planted again the doubt on my mind, and I feel the urge to test again, but I will resist.

More trouble ahead

The urologist has an unpleasant way of cheerfully smiling while giving you bad news. I'm calling him Dr. Sardonic.

I have two kidney stones, that's why this infection was particularly painful. He wants to break them in pieces and leave a stent for five days so the pieces will come out on their own. During those five days, I'd be very uncomfortable and urinating frequently.

I'd miss many work days. As a contractor, I don't get sick leave, though getting paid is the least of my worries. It bothers me that I might be giving the impression of being an unhealthy person that constantly misses work. When I was interviewed, they asked me why I had left my previous job, and I mentioned health problems as the main cause without giving too many details. I could tell there was a concern about me being healthy enough for this position, and I assured them I was. But this new situation certainly does not help.

I spoke to my primary care physician, Dr. Nice,  and according to him there's no need to rush this. Since I am no longer in pain, he thinks the one stone causing all the trouble has passed already. As for the second stone, he says I can deal with it when in acts up, but for now it's small enough that there is no need to do this.

So, no procedure, for now.

As for my missing period, no luck, Dr. Nice wants me to call Dr. Mediocre. Ugh.

The hypothetical kids

We used to talk about them all the time. They squeezed themselves into our conversations constantly. Will I still be working when we have kids? Will we buy a house in a good school district? If we don't, will we send them to a private school? Will we teach them Spanish or English, or both?

Slowly we moved on to the next verb tense, as we felt less confident. Would we let them spend time with their grandparents? Would we teach them to read at an early age? Would we let them watch TV? Would we be good parents? Would they be healthy?

Now the hypothetical kids seldom appear. I caught myself evaluating a house with no consideration to them. Worse, when the spouse asked if that particular house seemed large enough, my reply was: "It's large enough for the two of us".

And then I held my breath. Where were the hypothetical kids? Am I giving up on them or just giving up talking about them?

Day 44

With all the recent excitement I kind of neglected this issue. I am still awaiting my period. I know I should call Dr. Mediocre but I kind of want to put that off as much as I can. Plus, do I really want to see him ever again? Not really.

I also need to see the urologist for a follow up.  Maybe he'll have some ideas, or as a minimum recommend someone else...

As for the knitting event, I have not bought my ticket yet. Instead, I spoke to L, whom I met last Summer through HAND. She also happens to be a knitter and is happy to come with me. So now I have to buy tickets for both of us.

I feel a bit uneasy. What if I am unhappy and want to leave early? Will I be spoiling the fun for her? On the other hand, I believe she is the one person that will totally understand me if that happens.

Decisions, decisions

I am a knitter. I have other hobbies, but knitting has been an ongoing thing since I was 13. Every year I go to this event.

Last year I was 15 weeks pregnant when I started bleeding in the middle of one of the knitting classes. I went to see my doctor immediately and they found out that the subchorionic hematoma that had been detected earlier had grown much larger.  Less than a month later I miscarried.

This year I did not bother to sign up, not wanting to ever be there again.

Dr. Funny insists I should go. It's too late to sign up for classes, but he wants me to go to the "Market" anyway and buy lots of yarn and supplies. Then I should go sit near the conference rooms where the classes are held and pull out my purchases, admire them and be happy about them. He says I should not let my miscarriage ruin the good things in my life. And I know he is right. So everyday I visit the website, browse around, read about the few classes still available,  the merchants that will be there, and think how much fun it is going to be.

But I have not bought my ticket yet.