Thank you for the supportive comments on my last post. I'm still bothered by the fact that we have no plans whatsoever regarding further fertility treatments or even fostering (we cannot adopt, but we could foster). I will try to leave that alone until I meet again with Dr. Funny. By the way, cgd suggested therapy, which is, indeed, great advice. I know, because Dr. Funny is my therapist. Therapy has not been a cure-all, but it is one more tool that helps me put things in perspective and have a more optimistic view on life. I only wish I did not have to drive that far away to see him, but he is among the very few that takes my insurance and is willing to see me after work.
Doing stuff on the weekend is hard. The spouse is always working. When he's not working, he's learning and practicing new chess tactics. Which is great, I like that chess is his hobby, because that is a low risk activity he'll be able to pursue into his old age. Also, it is obviously less annoying than having a husband that's hooked to the TV, watching baseball or football. But it leaves little time for us to do things together other than walking the dog and going to the occasional movie.
Or going to the opera. The spouse loves it, but for years, he was either too poor to afford it, or lived in a place where it was not available, or both. When we moved here almost six years ago, having a good opera house 45 min away (and finally a decent salary) made it possible for us to enjoy it more often. Two years ago, we splurged on season tickets. Last year we didn't, since we expected to be caring for a newborn baby during the fall. But this year, once more, we got season tickets and will not miss a single opera.
Yesterday the season began with Heart of a Soldier, the first modern opera we've ever seen or listened to. It tells the story of Rick Rescorla, one of many of the 9/11 heroes. Because it is a modern opera, everything about it surprised me: the music, the pace, the imagery. The story in unforgettable, as it should be, and it was, I think, well told. I was reminded that the horrible tragedy of 9/11 is unquestionably worse than anything that I've been through.